anxious for nothing, but still full of questions
I have renewed hope. Both because it's a new year and, (not that He is a new God) because I have a new way of seeing Him. My perception is, slowly but surely, being transformed to see the differences between faith and trust. I recently read something by James Dobson that shed huge amounts of light upon something I had been struggling with for over a decade. I love it when someone else speaks so succinctly that it all falls into place, well in to my cranial reasoning anyway. I am sure my heart is also following suit.
It is not difficult for some of us to believe that God is capable of performing mighty deeds. After all, He created the entire universe from nothingness. He has the power to do anything He chooses. Having faith in Him can be a fairly straightforward thing.
To demonstrate trust, however, takes the relationship a step further. It involves the element of risk. It requires us to depend on Him to keep His promises, even when proof is not provided. It is continuing to believe when the evidence points in the opposite direction.
This is hard enough some days in my homeschool journey especially when I am seriously believing we will continue to homeschool through high school. That is not the popular decision around this county (which I have said before is just geographically huge) to say the least. Most people, if Dutch in heritage, send their kids to a private Christian school about a 45 minute drive from here OR, if not Dutch in heritage, the nearest Public High School does the trick. Why, after all, would a Mom consider homeschooling when it finally gets "serious". Funny that.
Add this element of faith moving into trust in my other life, that not pertaining to homeschooling, and I have some serious issues to face. This is when I am glad for family and for-real friends and trips to Barrie ... no one expects me to figure it all out in an instant, but they know I'm all about the adventure.
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