telemarketing fun

now, don't get me wrong ... I have been a telemarketer before.  I know what kind of training you get.  I know what the room that you work in looks like.  I know you are getting barely above minimum wage.  I know there is a blackboard of sorts at the front of the room where you get to record a "deal" that went through without a hitch.  you might even get to pick a candy from the glass jar next to the chalk board.  (well, I never did personally, but I witnessed it).  and I know this call may be monitored so I really, really, REALLY hope you listen to the one you just recorded :

phone rings at my house

me, with my standard answer at home: this is Kristina

silence (where I normally choose the 'hang up quickly it's a telemarketer' option)

I wait, though unsure why I am waiting, exactly

me: hello? simultaneously with telemarketer saying hello?
we dance like this a couple of times before he remembers he called ME

telemarketer:  can I please speak with mrs. apps?

me: inside voice, first: excellent, followed by outside voice: there is no one here by that name.  they must have had this number at one time because we get a lot of calls for them, but there are no 'apps' living here.

telemarketer:  look, I am calling for the number, NOT the name, OK?

me:  seriously ... YOU are getting mad, now, at ME?  um, I don't think so.

click.