Wednesday, February 23, 2011

lost

Have you ever lost anything of value? Do you still think about it? Imagine how you'd feel if you'd given it away instead.


I am, sadly, constantly losing things.  It's almost a perpetual state of I have no idea where it is at-edness.  I do, on the flip side, though, remember words.  almost verbatim.  this is not always a good thing.

once I lost my engagement ring.  I was afraid to say anything about it.  I eventually had to admit that I had because you can only keep your left hand in a pocket for so long.  the only solution, though, at a time like that, is to calmly and gently tell me how sad you are for me, but, honestly?  gotta live without it cause, yah,  money doesn't grow on trees.  I only felt slightly terrible because it wasn't expensive at all, and I had bought it myself all those years ago, on my handy dandy western mastercard. 

not that there's anything wrong with that.

when my mother in law found out, she produced a rather large diamond collective (fourteen diamonds all bigger than the single "one" I had lost ... yikes), saying that a girl needs an engagement ring and this was going to be my inheritance but she would give it to me, happily, now.  I found my original ring in an obscure pocket of my winter coat a bit later.  that's usually the way it goes.

I also, once, lost a really super cute mini brown phone, complete with mini spirally cord, that went in my fisher price doll house.  actually, the bully down the road (julie) stole it right out from under my nose.  she went so far as to proclaim that I didn't need the phone cause I was too stupid to use it properly so she was taking it.
clearly I am still not over that loss.

another time, I decided I was ok to part with dressie bessie, whom I received for my fifth birthday.  mom has the picture at home or I would "insert here".  I gave her to the church nursery.
a few months later I totally took her back.

what really counts, though, are the friends I have both lost and given away.
and I'm never really sure which hurts more.



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