Thursday, April 7, 2011


so far I feel like my "goal" for this month (to do a lot of exhaling) has been completely sabotaged by external circumstances.  like totally and absolutely out of my control not my fault circumstances.
I guess life is just like that, which goes to show that even though I may have lots of personal plans, it doesn't mean they will be my reality.
I'm getting better at going with the flow but sometimes I need prompting.

like how I was reminded, recently, that I probably should be doing some planning for this upcoming vacation of mine.  so I got out my usual travel bag only to find some candy I had hidden in it.  it was loose and had made a mess but nothing that would put me off eating it.  weird.  for someone who claims to like candy so much, you would think I would also consume the whole lot ... but I don't.  I only take it in bits.

like decision making.

used to be I had to know the answers yesterday.  now I'm coming to realize and accept that in the end, it all comes out in the wash, whether I stewed and stamped my feet or not.
I will remind you many times of my hoped-for outcome, however, while I wait.  some habits die hard.

or how about  shopping?

I literally left everything (but the clothes I flew home in) back in PNG two years ago.  I figured it would be easy for me to create another bunch of laundry and some of  our friends there had very little.  well, it turned out to be only partly easy.  I can shop happily, finding stuff I like enough to actually shell out cash for, but, having laid out every single article of summery stuff I have, I find that I am much more of an kinda gal.  individually I really dig my threads, but as a wearable wardrobe? 
kinda suckworthy.

oh well,
where I'm going in a couple of weeks I hear all I need are bathingsuits anyway.

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