Tuesday, January 11, 2011


I have already posted this picture, but I have to re-post it because it is the only one I have of the two of us. even more oddly, though, I find that neal has NO pictures of past girlfriends. strange. (ahem). when I try to find a blog-worthy photo (or just a picture in general) I am faced with the reality that the few I have are either hideous (especially of me … oh my word, how am I so talented in that area?) or totally, embarrassingly outdated. why? It’s probably because I talk so much I forget that I also mean to chronicle things, for posterity. *sigh* at least my memory hasn’t failed me.


though I do find that any time I discuss things with craig, he has a very different memory of our relationship. (he is absolutely wrong, by the way, in case you ever happen to meet him and the subject of me being a spastic girlfriend comes up. I am sure you wouldn’t believe that anyway).
I first saw craig on the staircase of the infamous seven dwarfs restaurant in picturesque lambeth. Oh my but he was the hottest thing I had ever had the pleasure of setting my eyes on. I believe I fell in love at first sight. he was such an amazing stair cleaner-er.

so, as I sat at the table with my parents and my brother, one of the waitresses came over to talk with us. she was friends with my mom and dad, so I thought nothing of it … until they started discussing the.boy.in.the.kitchen.who.wondered.if.he.could.give.me.his.number.

oh my word. mom and dad asked the waitress/friend many, many questions. apparently the fact that craig’s parents were british made him ok to date. I do remember that he asked if I was over 16. I believe that I stretched the truth a bit. maybe. things are foggy in that area.

I do remember calling him later, sitting on my futon, beside kim, and asking him a million and one questions. none were likely of any real consequence, but he liked the right music so, for me, it was a done deal, because, really, what else matters?

In any case, we dated happily for what feels like years, but he would have to try to help me remember how long, exactly, it was until it was all over … until that fateful valentine’s day when I wrecked everything. what can I say? I had a lot to learn. years and years later, at university, on the city bus, I looked out the window and thought I saw craig. for the briefest of moments I contemplated getting off the bus and seeing if it really was him, but alas, I stayed in my seat. life is like that sometimes.

no regrets. he was my first boyfriend and I chose dang well. he never had a negative word to say about me, my character, my face or anything else about me. he taught me to let my yes be yes and my no be no. (because twice I groveled and begged him to take me back but he wouldn’t) yep, he helped shape me into who I am today, and I am so glad I got to know him and be known, once, as his girlfriend. plus, he NEVER wore mesh shoes like subsequent not so well chosen boyfriends. craig was real cool beans.

AND writing about our breakup got me published, for the first time ever. so,craig, for the millionth time, I’m sorry I dumped you because you fell asleep on the couch after eating my pasta. and I’m forever sorry that I made fun of your brown car (which is ironic considering all I had was a white and red norco bike from crappy tire). It came back to bite me the summer neal and I had to borrow a van that was carpeted from floor to ceiling … and the heat was on full blast with no hope of turning it off or down. oh yeah, the shaggin’ wagon was an ego buster for sure and for certain.

craig, I wish you only the best. and if I ever make it to your restaurant and I eat the pasta, and my eyelids start to droop, feel free to give me the big what goes around comes around boot!

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